The Mother

Agenda

Volume 4

October 19, 1963

I am coming to the conclusion that there must be a great power (a transforming power, probably) in the extreme tension of circumstances.

Let me explain myself:

The Help is ever present, in the sense that you unquestionably feel that the Force acts (the “Force,” that is, the supreme Consciousness and supreme Knowledge), the Force acts with a sort of pressure on all people and all circumstances, in a favorable direction so that what happens may truly be the best – and the best hierarchically; in other words, the highest and purest (you know my definition of “pure”) is a sort of center in relation to which things get organized; they get organized hierarchically, each with its “right to progress,” but as if to favor what's closest to and most expressive of the Divine – that is going on constantly, I see hundreds of examples of it all the time. Yet, from the point of view of outer circumstances, there is such a tension that you feel you are close to catastrophe.

Sri Aurobindo told me that there are three difficulties, and they are the three things that have to be conquered for the earth to be ready (this is from the purely outward point of view, I am not speaking of psychological factors): government, money, health.

Of the three, health is the most directly connected to the inner transformation, but not completely so because it constantly depends on what comes in from outside: influences, vibrations – the contagion from the outside. You have to eat: everything you receive along with food – it's fantastic! There's so much that eating represents a considerable work – the physical digestion is nothing, but the work of assimilation and adaptation of all the rest is considerable. Consequently, of the three, health is the most directly under the influence of the inner progress, but, as I said, not completely so. Therefore, that too has to be conquered.

As for money, when Sri Aurobindo was here there was no problem: all that we needed came. Yet the last two years were beginning to be more difficult and he kept saying, I think I already told you, that it resulted from the wrong attitude of the people around; that this wrong attitude represented a considerable problem – it has gone from bad to worse, it has become quite acute.

As for government, it has followed an opposite curve: in the beginning, it was frightfully hostile, I mean, simply to be able to stay here we had to struggle every minute. And Sri Aurobindo told me that probably both health and money would give way at once; maybe health first and money afterwards, but not with a big difference. And he added, “As for the government, there is but one solution, only one: it is to BE the government.” If you are not the government, you will never be able to conquer it, except when the earth is transformed – but then there won't be any work left! This is the situation. Things have been like this for... forty, fifty years – more than forty years.

But because of my inner work, I become increasingly aware of things, increasingly aware of the Care, the Solicitude and the hierarchical Organization of circumstances so that the most precious and useful thing for the divine work is favored – of course not conspicuously so, but inwardly. And yet, in the three domains – government, money and health – things always reach a POINT, a point of such tension and complication that if you didn't have the inner certitude, they would always seem to point simply to the catastrophe, the fall. And it's ALWAYS at that point that... (gesture of abrupt reversal) everything turns around – not before, not one minute before.

It's not to give me faith – I have it; it's not to give me consciousness – I have it; it's for an outward reason. I cannot yet grasp why. Because inwardly, even if I were told that everything would be demolished in the most tragic manner, I would say, “Very well.” And in all sincerity, you know, nothing anywhere in me starts protesting or vibrating, nothing at all. I say, “All right.” But I see – I do see that in that tension, a certain power is released, like a power intense enough to cure a tamas, to change a tamas.¹

Yesterday (this is an example I give you, but in all three domains it's similar), yesterday it was a question of money. The question of money, for more than twelve years, has been a problem – growing increasingly acute because the expenses are increasing fantastically while the income is decreasing! (laughing) So the two things together make the problem very acute. It results in things to be paid but no money, which means that the cashier (the poor cashier, it does him a lot of good from the yogic viewpoint: he has acquired a calm that he never had before! But still he is the one who has to stand the greatest tension), the cashier spends money and I cannot reimburse him. Very well. And then it's not for me to run about, look for money, arrange things, discuss with people, of course, that wouldn't be proper (!), and those who do it for me have in them a rather sizable amount of tamas, which I cannot yet shake up. Anyway, yesterday they proposed something absurd to me (I don't want to go into the details, it doesn't matter), but their proposal was absurd and put me in a totally “unacceptable” situation. In other words, it might have brought a legal action against me, I might have been summoned before the court, anyway, all kinds of “inadmissible” things – not that I care personally, but they're “inadmissible.” When they proposed their idea to me, I looked and saw it was silly; I was very quiet, when, suddenly, there came into me a Power... (I told you it happens now and then) like this (massive gesture). When it comes, you feel as though you could destroy – destroy everything with it... you see, it's too awesome for the present state of the earth. So I answered very quietly that it was unacceptable, I said why, and I returned the paper. Then something COMPELLED me to add: “If I am here, it is not because of any necessity or obligation; it is not a necessity from the past, not a karma, not any obligation, any attraction, any attachment, but only, solely and absolutely because of the Lord's Grace. I am here because He keeps me here, and when He no longer keeps me here, when He considers I am not to stay any longer, I won't stay.” And I added (I was speaking in English), “As for me...” (“as for me” [gesture upward] that is, not this [gesture to the body]), “as for Me, I consider that the world isn't ready: its way of responding inwardly and outwardly, even visibly in those around me, proves that the world isn't ready – something must happen for it to be ready. Or else it will take QUITE SOME TIME for it to be prepared.... It's all the same to me: whether it is ready or not makes no difference. And everything could collapse, I – couldn't – care – less.” And with what force I said that! My arm rose, my fist banged on the table – mon petit, I thought I was going to break everything!

I was watching the scene, thinking, “Why the devil am I made to do this?!” These people are, apparently, quite devoted, quite surrendered and intimate enough not to be afraid. (I don't know what effect it had on them, but it must have had some effect.) As soon as it was over, I started working again, looking into affairs and so on. Afterwards, once I was alone, I wondered, “Why did that come into me?”... And in the evening, I had the solution to the situation: it's here (Mother takes an envelope on the table). I didn't even look at it (Mother opens the envelope and looks at the amount of a check).

Then I said to myself: that's how it is, there must be a certain tamas – an uncomprehending tamas – which in order to change needs to be violently shaken up. With illnesses, it's the same thing, in the sense that only when things really seem about to topple over on the wrong side... I go out of my body deliberately, hovering over all things, and the body recovers – now it takes very little time: a quarter of an hour or twenty minutes.

From the point of view of government, it also seems to be the same thing, as if all the difficulties little by little BROUGHT to power people who are under my influence.² But it's still sporadic – I think it is the thing that will give way last. Sri Aurobindo said it would happen in '67... we still have some time, it's only '63, four years to go. It's not that we'll govern ourselves (God knows we don't have the time!), but “to be the government” means that in the government, there will be people directly under the Influence. And it's not enough if it's local (God knows! [laughing! I have never seen anything more rotten!), it's not enough if it's local, it's not enough if it's Indian, not at all: it has to be global for... And clearly, for the moment, we are still very far from it – even in the invisible, even in the Inconscient.

There are some signs. Some signs before which ordinary people would marvel and rejoice but which to me are far from sufficient.

No, concerning government, the issue is still undecided, and yet... Only, there are so many things that tend, that draw near, and then they go off at a tangent – that's the trouble, for when they go off at a tangent, then they go very far away... (gesture showing the possibility coming very close to crossing History, then moving away along an immense circle backward, to return again)... and they take a very long time to return.³

Something is being attempted now: there are some people who are in contact with us and are conscious; they have a possibility of action and they are trying. They have caught an idea: to bring Russia and America together so that the two powers united will be the agents of peace on earth. It's an EXCELLENT idea. We'll see what's going to happen.

Because obviously... Oh, to tell the truth, I don't know. I say “obviously,” but it's absolutely all the same to me if everything is demolished and starts again – it's another way of playing, that's all. But maybe without demolishing... To demolish and start all over again [laughing) has already been done a few times! Maybe that's enough – if, without demolishing, men could progress... But is it possible?

We must come VERY CLOSE to the goal for that to be possible.

The big difficulty is that tamasic stupidity. Yesterday, in this connection, I had the experience of a young couple who came to see me. (It has become a custom nowadays that young people who are going to marry and whose families I know, or who live here, come to receive my blessings before marrying! That's the new fashion.) So they came. The girl was educated here and the boy stayed here for quite a long time, working here; anyway, they want to marry. The boy went searching for a job; he had trust [in Mother] and found one. He is – I can't say conscious because it isn't like consciousness, I would call it rather superstition (!) but it's a superstition on the right target! The movement is ignorant, but well directed, so it works; not that he has an enlightened faith, but he has faith. All right. Things are fine and he does very well. So they came yesterday to receive my blessings. Then they went. And they left behind in the room... a vital formation, very bubbly, absolutely ignorant, very bubbly with a joie de vivre, a joie de vivre so blissfully ignorant of all possible difficulties, all possible miseries, and not only for oneself but for everyone! You know, that joie de vivre that says, “Oh, it doesn't matter to me if we are born and die – life is short, well, let it be good, that's enough.” No mental curiosity, no urge to know the why of the world – all that is nonsense, we needn't bother about it! Let's be happy, have some fun, and do as well as we can. That's all.... That formation was so strong, you know, in the room that I saw it and had to find a place for it. It put me in contact with a whole domain of the earth, of mankind, and I had to put it in its proper place, put it in order and organize it. It took me a little time (long enough, maybe three quarters of an hour or an hour), I had to order and organize everything. Then I saw how widespread it is on earth. (Note that these young people belong to the “top” of society, they are regarded as very intelligent, they are very well educated, in a word, it's about the best you can find in mankind! Not the dregs, far from it.) And I wondered if it isn't even more widespread in Western countries than here – I think it is. At that moment I came into contact with everywhere, and, well, the “everywhere” was really quite extensive.

Afterwards, I asked myself, “But what the devil can be done with all this?...” Disturb these people? They are quite incapable of getting out of their condition in this life and will probably need many, many, many lives to awaken to the NEED TO KNOW – as long as they can move about, you know (laughing), as long as they can move about and things aren't too painful, they're quite contented! And then, in addition, there is, all the way down, that whole inert mass, you know, of men who are very close to the animal – what can be done with that? If that too has to be ready, it seems to me impossible.... Because that young couple, according to human opinion, are very fine people!

So how many... HOW MANY consciousnesses must there be, what quantity, if we may say (intensity, there is: off and on it shines like stars), what is the mass of consciousnesses necessary to enable this new world to come down on earth?... Otherwise, what would happen to it? It would be swallowed up. Like in '60, when I saw the supramental forces descend (mon petit, what a sight it was! They were descending, it was stupendous, marvelous; they were like torrents, you felt as though they were going to inundate everything), and then, from below, there rose up great, dark blue masses like this, and they went vroof! (gesture of engulfing) And everything was swallowed up.

So it would be the same thing PHYSICALLY, you understand.

(silence)

So, yesterday, there was first the visit of those young people, then that question of money, and then that manifestation [of Power], which comes from time to time. Afterwards, I asked myself, “How is it ..? How is it that I was that way?” It lasts for a time, I do a certain thing, then it disappears completely. And I feel surprised, you know, surprised. The first times it happened, something in the body was having some difficulty holding it [the Power]; now, nothing whatsoever, the body doesn't feel anything, it's grown accustomed to it. Perhaps that's what is being done: the body is being accustomed. But if that Power were there all the time, good grief! People would have to behave themselves, because...

So I was looking at it and thinking, “How come?” I was neither angry nor upset nor anything at all – within, there was always that same Love, unchanging, always, always there, for everything; even when I perceive things with a kind of discernment (not even an intuitive one, a discernment higher than intuitive, which is like a clear vision – clear, precise, in the white Light), the discernment of all the stupidity, all the ill will, all the crookedness – a very clear discernment – it is always with a Smile, there is always that same Vibration of an eternal Love. Then that Power comes – it doesn't disturb anything, it doesn't take the place of anything: it's an addition. It's an action: it does its action and then goes away. But while it's there... you know, the Force that made me bang my fist on the table could have smashed everything. But of course, a poor little hand, a poor little arm, could only shake the table!... (Mother laughs) It could only make a lot of noise and shake the table. But the perception was tremendous.

That was the last time, but not the first.

Certain times, I don't budge; at times it comes when I am alone, so naturally I don't say a word and don't budge, but after a while, there comes a kind of... (what can I call it?) I wonder, “What's going to happen?...” It's not an anxiety but something that observes and asks, “But is it really possible to let this... let this manifest?” And it always comes in connection with a circumstance, an action, a movement (sometimes – very rarely – an idea in someone, but that's rare), and it comes almost as a NECESSITY: “This must be struck down” (gesture of bringing down a sword of light). And what a mighty striking-force!... Out of all proportion with earthly things. Then away it goes – I don't pull it down nor do I send it back: I witness the thing, and the body is used, nothing else. And then it's gone.

There is a constant aspiration in the body for everything that can perfect it – perfect the instrument, I mean – and there is very, very little asking for Power. When Sri Aurobindo was here, there was a clear awareness of the necessity of Power, and several times I said, “It is the supramental Power that will manifest first.” Because, without Power, it will be impossible: the mass of opposition in the world is sufficient to swallow up everything, just as the Light was swallowed up in '60 – the supramental Light and Consciousness were swallowed up; it will be the same thing. But afterwards, when I had to do the whole task, I no longer insisted on this point [Power], there wasn't the sense of this necessity any more but rather the feeling of a WHOLE that has to progress together and manifest together. A kind of perfection of the Whole.

But it's coming.

But, for example, when we used to have those gatherings for the pujas⁴ and Durga used to come (when Sri Aurobindo was here and for some time afterwards), when she manifested, there was a great power that came along with her – but that's nothing! Nothing compared to That. Durga's power... yes, it's like milk and water in comparison.

And there is absolutely nothing vital about it – now I find vital power quite crude, almost repugnant. There's nothing vital about it: it's something from on high. It always comes with a golden Vibration, very strong, and so massive!...

But it comes only when the situation is extremely tense; which might explain that it is probably necessary to shake up all that Matter a bit, and that it can come only when all the other means won't do any more.

You know, at those times, I feel such a force in me, even a physical strength, greater than I have ever felt in my life, even when I was young and strong enough, and it makes me feel that people's physical strength... is nothing! The first time it came after my illness (I wasn't on my guard), it did so for no apparent reason (possibly as a test) and there was this instrument on my table (Mother points to a penholder mounted on a steel pivot). So the Force came, and for some reason or other I wanted to push this thing down. I put my hand on it without any effort, any force (but the Force was there, it was in my arm): snapped off! (It isn't easy to break.) Snapped clean off! Without the shadow of an effort. The doctor was here, he asked me “Why?” I told him, “Oh, I didn't do it deliberately, a force took hold of my arm and went snap!” And I did it consciously; I saw, I saw the Force, saw a sort of golden bolt of lightning, very strong, that came and – snap! I didn't make the slightest effort. The doctor was upset! (He is a man with a sattvic nature.) He told me, That is stupid, it breaks your things — I'll get others!

That was the first time. Afterwards, I was on my guard.

When Sri Aurobindo was here, there was a boy who was quite uncontrollable: he had fits of anger which he couldn't control (not that it occurred to him to control them!). He was an engineer and a very intelligent boy (but that makes no difference), and once, while Sri Aurobindo was in my room, this boy came up the stairs and had me called. I went out to see him. Then he flew into a great rage, began shouting and in his rage tried to rush at me. Well, I simply put my two hands on his shoulders, without an effort, like that – he went tumbling down the stairs. Quite simply, I stopped him from coming near by touching his shoulders.... But that was clearly Kali. Sri Aurobindo came and I told him what had happened. (The boy had got back to his feet and was climbing the stairs again; when he saw Sri Aurobindo, he scampered off!... He never did it again, of course.) But that was clearly Kali: when Kali wants to, she can be very strong, but that still belongs to the realm of terrestrial things. She is very strong: I simply stopped the boy from coming near, I put my hands on his shoulders, he lost his balance and fell all the way down the stairs, he rolled right down the stairs. So I thought it was Sri Aurobindo who had made Kali intervene (he had heard that demented boy shout, you see).

It's not the same thing. Long ago, when Sri Aurobindo was here, Kali used to come from time to time – but it still belongs to this world, it's not the same thing [as the supramental Power].

Another time, a fellow (there are some demented characters of that kind) had come from Australia: he was a teacher and had been given classes in the School. He started to preach unbelievable things – he was God incarnate, you see! Until the day it began to be a pain in the neck. And he had declared he would stay here forever.... People were annoyed, everyone was annoyed, they didn't know what to do. I was in my room here (it was three years ago, maybe four). I remember: I was sitting on my bed (at the time I used to work on my bed, over there), and I received a letter in which I was told... in short, that it had become impossible, intolerable, that he could not be kept here. So I concentrated for a minute and Kali arrived – Kali in her battling mood, a black, dancing Kali. I told her, “Why don't you go on his head?” (Laughing) She went and did her dance on his head – the next day, he wrote he was leaving the Ashram. In this case, it was very clear: the day before, he had declared that he wouldn't budge, that he intended to stay here and continue his lessons, and that we would have to send him away forcibly for him to go (they had told me all this quite tearfully). Kali's dance convinced him he had better go!

But all that, you see, it's the play of the world. What is going on now is something else, altogether something else.

It comes, it acts, it goes. And it doesn't give any advance notice of its coming!

At such moments, the body feels very vast – vast, limitless, very vast, as though it were TOUCHING all Matter; there is a conscious contact with all Matter. And banging my fist as I did yesterday is quite symbolic, nothing but symbolic: it wasn't a table, my fist banged on the earth! “Earth, if you are not ready, well, you will be left to fend for yourself; we'll go away and come back when you're ready.”

So it appears to be a necessity to shake up a tamas somewhere – there is plenty of TAMAS, plenty.

You understand, I don't feel any haste – I love stones, flowers, plants, animals so much, they're all so wonderful! It begins to be less pleasant beyond... the most unpleasant is human perversion – perversion of cruelty, of wickedness, of hardness. You have to rise higher to be able to accept it, to be unaffected by it.

But that thing I saw yesterday, that bubbly formation of joie de vivre, I saw clearly that it's one of the greatest obstacles – one of the greatest obstacles: a vital joy that knows only itself, that knows nothing other than its own vital joy and is PERFECTLY content. I saw it was a great obstacle, because... it already contained a sort of reflection of the True Thing. And then, you can only laugh, but there are stern people who say, “You'll see when you get sick, you'll see when you get old....” (All that came because there was a whole work, which represents a whole great drama on the earth's scale, there was this and that and that....) What for? Why be stern? Let them be happy, they represent... why, it's like foam on fresh beer!

*
*   *

Just before leaving

I had a dream last night, it's the last thing I remember. It was like a mountain road and there were enormous vehicles, like tanks, very black, very high, climbing up the mountain. And I had a feeling they were Russians or Chinese, like an enormous military convoy, very, very black, climbing up the mountain.

It isn't a dream! Perhaps it's what's going on up there.⁵

You probably went there.

(silence)

Yes, one can see things that way, many things.

It's to show you that you have inner senses – one goes and sees, one wanders about and comes back. (Laughing) It's exercises!

¹ Tamas: inertia, darkness.

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² It is the period of the Kennedy-Khrushchev-de Gaulle “combination.” Indira Gandhi will come to power about two years later.

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³ President Kennedy will be assassinated almost exactly a month later (on November 22).

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⁴ In October and November, the pujas of the different aspects of the Mother.

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⁵ In the Himalayas.

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